Life is Too Short for Lies and Only Doing What Makes You Happy

Photo by Roxana Gonzalez
I was watching the movie My Mom’s New Boyfriend (rated PG-13) the other day, and in it the character, Marty, made two statements that got me thinking.

The first was that life is too short for lies. While I don’t think the length of one’s life should have any bearing on truth-telling, I ‘get’ that the point that was being made is that we only have so much time here on earth and we should not be wasting that time with falsehoods and misleading others. Lies waste the time of the liar who has to keep track of their lies, think up material to use in their lies, and continually add to their lies in order to maintain them and cover-up the fact that they are lying. Truth is simple, easy-to-remember, and direct. No time is wasted when one simply tells the truth.

The second statement that the character from the movie made that got me thinking is that she believes in only doing those things that makes her happy.

After some thought, I realized that in some ways, this statement can illustrate a truly great way to live.

If you have a good sense of yourself and have your head on straight, then the things that make you happy would be those things that would not be harmful to yourself (like drugs) or others. This means the opposite would hold true as well – that those things that would make you feel unhappy would also be those things that would be harmful to you or others. So, in that context, only doing things that make you happy would be, largely, living an altruistic life. To truly live a completely altruistic life, there is a little more involved, but certainly, this would be a step in the right direction.

What do you think of the statements?

LDS Singles: Misuse of the Priesthood and a Special Singles Presentation Just for YOU

I subscribe to several sections of the About.com website. One of them is the LDS section. I have gotten a lot of great information for Family Home Evening (FHE), free music, and blog fodder, among other things.

Today I got an email update and it had two things in it I think are highly relevant to LDS Singles:

By Persuasion and Long Suffering is about the proper use of the priesthood - which is not to be domineering in relationships.

LDS Single Adult Presentation: For the Strength of You which is a powerpoint presentation addressing topics relevant to singles.

I hope you'll check them out, and then leave feedback in the comments section here about your thoughts regarding them.

How Just Trying to Get Along Can Backfire

I caught an episode of House online today, and in it something interesting happened in relation to relationships.

Wilson and "CB" were choosing a mattress together. Each had a preference. She told him to pick whichever mattress he wanted - that either was fine with her. He choose the one that she preferred. When she realized it, she was upset. She told him that his pattern of 'just trying to get along' by doing whatever his former partners wanted rather than doing things he wanted created resentment in him and led to the demise of those relationships. She told him not to do that to her. She wanted him to use his own voice in their relationship, too.

She brings up a good point. Where is that line in relationships between genuinely being kind to your partner and doing things 'just to get along' that create resentment?

It seems to me that if you feel in any way pressured (real or imagined pressure) to do something 'just to get along', it is likely going to create a feeling of resentment in you. There is nothing wrong with an ebb and tide in a relationship where each partner gets something they want, when what they want diverges.

Like "CB", it drives me crazy when someone does the 'just trying to get along' thing with me. Just as I want a partner who will know when to 'give' to me, I also want the opportunity to 'give' to my partner. I don't want a mindless sheep who will give in to everything I want. I don't have all the answers, and I certainly don't want all of the responsibilities. I want a partner who will create a relationship and life with me - by my side.

What are YOUR thoughts about 'just trying to get along'?